hanging out with cisgender people is like an endless onslaught of microaggressions

i shouldn't torture myself like that

@MURRUMUR for awhile I thought maybe I was being too much of an isolated edgelord only interacting with other ppl on any substantial basis if they're at least some sort of trans but a few months ago had the displeasure of talking to some cis ppl at a bar and yeah like holy shit how is it 2026 and they still think it's acceptable to act the ways they do

@MURRUMUR
> go online
> people are hitler
> go outside
> people are hitler
such is life

@MURRUMUR when I first came back to the city I went to meat my friends boyfriend and her and they’re both cis and it was so awkward I was trying to show them music and like … the boyfriend was just being aggressive and like calling me Satan 😭

@MURRUMUR he didn’t actually call me Satan but he was mean

@nyx I've been around more cis people than usual because of local scene whatever, and it's definitely partially a zoomer thing but cis people just have no filter be rude as fuck for no reason basically

@MURRUMUR the thing that really gets me is that it's not like I have unreasonable expectations, I know that most cis people are going to be ignorant and stupid about like basically any trans stuff, because none of them actually care or know anything about trans ppl unless they already know a trans personally. it's fine, whatever.

but like they will just ask the most invasive questions for no reason with no indication that they're doing anything that would be weird and invasive if it were about the sexual proclivities of another cis person or medical procedures they've had or whatever, and will simultaneously be overly dramatic about failing on like the most basic bitch stuff like pronouns while still misgendering you to your face repeatedly. it's like trying to talk to a toddler who hasn't learned even a rudimentary degree of social etiquette, let alone empathy, and I know that it's because even the nominally progressive cissies think of us not as people deserving of basic rights or respect but as sexual degenerate freakshows for their own amusement or gratification...

but the worst part is that they aren't even aware of it and are operating on pure unconscious apelike sociopathy to a degree of acting actually subhuman.

@nyx @MURRUMUR yeah like I try to understand their material circumstances but sometimes those circumstances are just "they're evil"

@nyx @MURRUMUR i think a lot of the time the unconcious drive is a result of something more systemic and malicious happening through them. they are trying to codeswitch on the level of social viewing and they see your self advocacy as 'bringing them into' the world of agreement that you are what you say you are. they mess it up because they dont want to codeswitch from the past to the present or from the majority to the minority. in fact both these forms blur in kind. the majority past versus the 'delusions' of the minority self-agent based present. they are like flies trapped in amber and their annoyance is a result of you trying to plead them out of the amber.

for me its sort of this formative view for how fascist societies operate and tumble. theres a lot of 'self encoding' their whole lives has been built on and the idea that you represent some fracture in a clear holistic view of the past 'as described' hurts their formative ego and inclusion in the world of now. somebody might bring up rodney king and they will for instance, roll their eyes and say 'we are talking about this now'? place, time, and experience is not something that has happens with agents trying to advocate for themselves its this paved concrete parking lot. this isnt really meant to invalidate a view that they are unbearable but to instead attempt to highlight the complexities of this to the viewer. in order to escape the madness of this way of thinking you have to stop believing in a 'pure history' and instead constantly regard a world of agents and self-advocacy, across all lines.

also I would say cisness in general operates on the function of as much invasive question asking as possible. preganancy questions, trying to figure out the babies gender for the shower, giving away all your data on facebook to be included, asking people about their dating lives and having that be the next 3 hours, family gossip. its all very intrusive by design so ultimately it doesnt occur to them at all that their questions to you are intrusive. however, they have continued to do this despite our attempts to dissuade them from the privacy of the question, this is due to a material culture of extreme aggression and social coercion in reponse to privacy and unshared information. therefore the cis cannot fundamentally be trusted because theyve been programmed out of ever appreciating privacy in itself. or not using other people for their own means. the cis has no moral kantianism

@Erato_Heti @MURRUMUR this is also true, it's really remarkable how much of cisciety is essentially built on these really simplistic algorithms for social interaction that are all devoid of any awareness or context that is designed to control people's behavior and not think about certain things. like I said it is quite literally subhuman to be operating on that level of being a brainless automaton going through the different state transitions that are designed for one to navigate the sort of dystopic modern civilization that was architected in the 20th century to control as many people as possible at scale while not fundamentally rising above the level of an animal whose sole purpose in life is ultimately still to be a breeder.

and yeah I was going to say that this is the closest to how I define something like the nature of evil despite being a Spinozan egoist amoralist type, because to me becoming is the fundamental law of the universe and to deny it is objectively an affront to "God" in this respect, but this is pretty much the definition of what being cis is and it's very apparent in how it completely short-circuits their programming whenever they interact with a tranny.

@nyx @MURRUMUR it's like a semi cliche when ur used to it but it's also fucking nuts how much more conscious even the most basic trans person is of like mh shit like cis theory of mind is totally nonexistent

@winterklaus @MURRUMUR I really do take it for granted esp because a lot of trannies are pretty fucking stupid and mediocre themselves but yeah like I tend to forget how bad things are. sometimes I'll tell myself that this whole "not a person" stuff is kinda like mental illness LARP that is just sanitized by being a cultural phenomenon in transfem spaces but then I'll remember how fucking vacuous the average cissy is and being like yeah I really do not identify at all with the most dominant ideas of what being human supposedly is.

@nyx @MURRUMUR i didnt want to chud out and start being annoying about the ethics stuff. I wanted my scramble thought to end somewhere. but I think a good way to describe the cisciety heartlands is to realize that the utilitarian counterexample of the 'Organ Donor problem' is only a problem of the Family-Nation for them.

The organ donor problem says that, there is a way to make the society better but we have to harvest the organs of a random person that walks into the doctors office. What scares cisciety is the 'randomness' factor of the problem, otherwise it isnt a problem. The idea that people are expendable as a reasource and have no privacy is a given to this type of person (and, unfortunately, a lot of trannies today to who are sadly self-flattening and uneducated about their own becoming capacities).

The point, this perception of expendability is, quite literally evil and also as anti-kantian as it gets. Because its using the other as an end for your own means. Now obviously kantian ethics can be overcome, but not by going backwards in the way of literally accepting the organ harvesting problem, of pushing the fat man on the tracks, of telling the violinist they cant leave.

Cis people have a certain kind of social politics which is 'i love the world but keep all that awful stuff over there for me to play with'. Hence, there is no distinction in my mind between the person willing to condemn a genocide without a further course of action and somebody who endorses the same genocide. They already feel comfortable with the fact its happening 'somewhere else' and take the fear of whats happening in their own nation only when its happening there. The cis person is so much more concerned about the theoretical atomic bomb dropping than the non theoretical death of children by bombs because they have already priced in that expendability.

I know this sounds like I'm being extreme and unfruitful but I *kirkenuinely* think this is why we have a tendency towards a very distinct and often 'ultraleft' worldview in comparison to the cis. theres a whole style and motion of Remembering that is actually happening within these halls. even if there is defects here and there there is a worldview here that is fundamentally antigenocide, antitorture, antirape, anticoercion, proprivacy, etc that the cis merely only 'performs' for their snacks.

@nyx @MURRUMUR i also cant help but realize this might be along some of the most Doomed shit ive ever said so I can just hope that I'm saying it among ppl thats mind wont completely obliterate into despair at me attempting to codify the incision point. I was just on a kick and wanted to sort of try and put the final restraints on the the thought before I let it spiral out of control inwards incorrectly.

@nyx @winterklaus @MURRUMUR cisgender ppl only act decent out of fear i have concluded lately, so i try not to be too friendly even to those i see regularly

@zx @MURRUMUR @winterklaus this is why we need girl street gangs. politeness will be enforced with violence

@zx @nyx @MURRUMUR @winterklaus true. thats the right call.

fear doesnt always turn them inward though. they are afraid of being alone or ignored and so entitle themselves in many ways to our bodies and minds. thats why you need to keep pepper spray on you and remember not to even bother going on the 'defensive' if they start fucking with you online.

@Erato_Heti @MURRUMUR @nyx it's lumpenisation and like being a particular kind of alienated subject in relation to sociality. it's why i think transfeminism always needs more Mad theory

@winterklaus @Erato_Heti @MURRUMUR yeah I need more MAD theory alright, trannies need to acquire nuclear capabilities

@zx @nyx @MURRUMUR don't get me wrong, here at least cis queers are relatively pleasant at least. it's just there's no way a thing like me would even end up close in the first place cus I've always been this socially marginal weirdo except (not exactly except 🥀) among transfemmes, probably by virtue of the way hylics intuitively have a nose for schizospec freaks

@nyx @winterklaus @MURRUMUR

i saw at the recent conference China decided to agree with US that iran shouldnt have nukes and in my heart I knew that meant it was important for. the ayatollah to win this war. the take away from MAD is not that nobody should have nukes its that everyone should have nukes i feel like I'm getting ragebaited daily. do ppl not realize that the cuban missle crises was the closest the worst ever came to actually existing. peace and harmony?

@Erato_Heti @nyx @MURRUMUR tbh thr nuclear MAD paradigm will probably come to an end whether by fire or by sufficiently advanced distributed hypermodern cybernetic warfare

@Erato_Heti @MURRUMUR I've said before that there are probably only a few exceptional cases at this point where I could ever have any significant personal investment in a cis person and not at best have a cordial relationship to not upset the ecosystem if not otherwise viewing them as expendable or hostile Bethesda NPCs, because trannies more often than not are forced by the shitty circumstances we endure into having to become people. but ironically, being human is no longer what it used to be like when Ernst Jünger wrote Storm of Steel or some shit when it was more common for the average person to face death and so most of us no longer particularly identify with the idea of being human. it's no longer the norm to have to endure hardships of some kind that force you to develop a concept of mind and introspection and all that; rather in the sort of soft domesticated cattle world that we've built in modern civ, especially in the first world and especially for cis people, everyone can perpetually remain mentally, emotionally, and intellectually a teenager. in the case of older generations like boomers it's more like being a toddler your whole life in fact.

in this set of conditions the average cis person has no concrete concept of death. for most it's an abstraction that they see on TV, and their opinions on things like genocide or whatever all formed in response to abstractions. it's all noise without signal, going through the algorithms of social rituals mindlessly in order to fit oneself into some subgroup within the herd, and so long as it remains an abstraction, so long as it's happening somewhere else, it continues to serve its purpose as a sign removed from the signifier. but it's harder to do this with trannies because we are an abstraction turned in on itself and so we cannot be confined to any particular physical space, "happening somewhere else", and so these contradictions are all readily apparent whenever we have to interact with cis ppl.

@nyx @MURRUMUR i agree with that breakdown, however I dont think we are really 'distanced' from it but merely a distinct subaltern. I think we have been confined through a sort of digital spatialization. a media space of hate. when people think of stuff like online harrassment, the infamous HALing, of the street mobbing. I think a lot of this is envisioned as induvidual acts and not a post-spatial aparthiedization. this is kind of why I think its important for us to actually sympathize with the unethical treatment in aparthieds and genocides and sort of align along those terms because we can see the fundamental 'benign humdrum' of evil more than most others. its in fact that we have been treated as an underclass within empire that has created the conditions of true dissent.

@Erato_Heti @MURRUMUR @nyx @winterklaus aslo tru tru, the ones that turn inwards are like "progressives" mostly, usually lgbt in some way

@zx @MURRUMUR @nyx @winterklaus they can rumormill you or get really competative in a more serpentine way if they feel hurt/afraid enough. i agree with u that most people are fundamentally non-violent though in the sense that the 'paranoid' piece of what im stating is actually a bit overstated.

@Erato_Heti @MURRUMUR this is a very concise statement of problems I've been thinking over for years now about how transmisogyny has taken form like institutionally or systemically over the past few years, especially described as "post-spatial aparthiedization"

@nyx @MURRUMUR im kind of embarrassed with what i said tbh because ive offhandedly implied we need to sympathize with unethical abuses but hopefully people know i didnt mean it like that.

never ask the otaku e-girl. never ask the otaku e-girl her opinion on Unit 731

@nyx @MURRUMUR mmm Unit 731, i think I know about that. thats an SCP thing right? I love SCP stories

@nyx @MURRUMUR oh yeah btw, thank you, im glad i can help. I know a lot of the time I seem like I just cant stop yapping because I like to be silly sometimes but a lot of the time I do try to value brevity and precision. its something I take important as a skill.

also you incidentally gave me a really nice present by giving me that compliment on my birthday. 'your growth is noticeable'

@nyx @zx @MURRUMUR @winterklaus girlbiker girlgangs NOW

@Erato_Heti @MURRUMUR @nyx @winterklaus of course, ive actually had this happen to me in a personal level.. im just tryin to generalize. but yea never lettin the guard down really

@MURRUMUR haha yeah the cisses are so weird right *sweating*

@winterklaus @MURRUMUR @nyx @zx the cis/hylic (vs trans/pneumatic) dialectic is very interesting to me wrt cis people being evil to trans people because just thinking in my own experience the most pneumatic mystic cis guy i know is also incidentally the cis guy i know who is the most normal about trans people . something to do with becoming i suspect

@Erato_Heti @zx @MURRUMUR @nyx @winterklaus what would you suggest doing instead if they fuck with you online?

@yohan @Erato_Heti @MURRUMUR @nyx @winterklaus dont engage its a trap

@zx @yohan @MURRUMUR @nyx @winterklaus i mean its not always that cut and dry but yes usually the best course of action is to disengage and ignore

@yohan @Erato_Heti @nyx @winterklaus @zx ALWAYS disengage . "winning" against online people most necessitates making them REALLY REALLY mad and nothing makes them madder than ignoring them . fortunately enough this also gets them to fuck off the easiest