nno… is that… gulps yiour pussy

you decide to come to work early . it’s going to be a big day
you’ve spent the last couple of weeks carefully scraping away database rot from the sample

something floats to the surface. you pull it out.
a gort from brain.worm.pink, perfectly preserved

you check the date & gasp. it’s from 2024

this was from the period of unity, before moidkey stopped federating with fujomma
see. without the fujos to keep the xenofems in check, girlfailure rates rose like crazy. the simple joy of having an “oomf” was lost. the last remaining femboys were executed in brutal hate campaigns

the t in lgbt stands for tapeworm

fedi in 2100: today i will join a misskey instance!
umm ... didnt you hear?? its called MxKey now !!!!!!! (vine boom)
wtf!!! 😨 what about glitch-soc??
umm.... actually , its glitch-thigh-highs!!!!! (vine boom)
wtf ... 😰 what happened to pleroma ?

2025 May 14th. i remember where i was. i was in the supermarket, & the music stopped - it was drake they were playing. ill never forget that. the music stopped & they made the announcement. & we wandered into the street , shells of ourselves

sometimes i forget that fedi isn't just this little fucked up corner that i live in . sometimes i even forget that there are extremely strange people extremely close to this corner

men should wear skirts because blah blah blah. i dont CAARE . shut UPPP . forcefem men for fun

@badfediposts please stop posting good fedi posts <3

my wife's a fuckin faggot!!!! come drop my ass and drag it!!!! i'm like a mouse just grab my tail and you can run me ragged!!!!

ive become the resident homestuck expert in my friend group and it reminds me that i am mortal

what ift our PENISES touched! (thunderous applause)

that monster .. is in your iPhone today

porn of my wife

just tested positive for woke

>we've got you surrounded!! enable omemo!!!!!

nooo i love my sexy fed lady fbi dommy PLEASE wiretap my urethra.... 🥺 uohhh im gonna fedpost!! im gonna fedpost!!!! advanced interrogation techniques 😭😭😭💢💢💢

Dearest President Xi, i am 7 years old american girl nameds Sophia, our western district of California longs for liberation…please send Dongfeng-41 intercontinental ballistic missiles and Chengdu J-10 Vigorous Dragon multirole fighter to free the people of imperialist illegitmate fake nation the United States of America

i'm so fucking pregnant

these bitches calling me "woke." let me sleep bitches . i dont wanna be woke anymore i want to go to bed

@Merc FUCK THIS! LIKE THIS POST IF YOU LOVE BITCHES WHO ARE STRANGE AND UNSETTLING TO THE GENERAL PUBLIC

RE: https://lab.nyanide.com/objects/bd9fdc0c-8eb8-47be-aba8-e9200952d4b3