Replacing all these goddamn pumps must be how it feels when they find asbestos and lead pipes and shit on home renovation shows

gay j glassbeach: here it is again another heart of excitement in the form of a girl who fucks my ass

if mozart were born today she would be a polyamorous lesbian and she would be in the club mixing techno

rip wolfgang amadeus mozart you wouldve made a great trans woman

Air to Ground Message:

CHEMTRAIL TANKS EMPTY UNABLE TO COVER SECTOR AA23. PAX SUSPICIOUS. PLEASE ADVISE.

Area: New York City, NY, USA
Type: Bombardier CRJ900
A: #a45a8b89073
F: #f011a26d863

#acars #vdlm2

creating vines? but Vine shut down YEARS ago???

@sierra smoking straight tar

We asked ChatGPT to kick us in the balls. Here's what we've learned:

smoking the shit that updates you to ios 8

< destroying angel has to be one of the hardest names given to any lifeform

do epic shite wiff 'er cunt

@fiore @ikeWren iphone commercial where im buttchugging and then immediately pass out and my friend goes oh.. oh my god! Wait

Picks up my phone and calls the ambulance.

The commercial reminds you that phones can call, in an emergency.

@fiore @ikeWren iphone commercial where I fake sucking cock but fake choke gag and throw up bc all over my phone and start heaving out an apology between breaths

@monkey @fiore ok grandma let's get you back to bed

@fiore fuuuuuck youre righttt

the concept of smoking an ipjone is the funniest thing in existence to me right now i dont care . how do you even think of that shit it didnt even occur to me that you could set an iphone on fire intentionally

fuuuckkk dude today i gotta smoke my iphone

@nyx you get it.

Sometimes when I'm like waiting to do something I imagine I'm a cell and how claustrophobic that would be, and the frantic spastic movements of the compounds, enzymes and proteins within me, shaking chaotically yet in rhythm with a billion other cells and their respective constituent parts, and how loud the the thrumming scream of metabolism permeates everything, all in a dark, wet, void of interstitial fluids wooshing between me and my neighbors, the tension and pressure of division, and the inevitable hollow THWOCK of apoptosis as my daughters rush to fill my space.