Stop womansplaining Star Wars

No Ukko, you're an idiot and should learn from mommy Eris

JK Eris would never say that to Ukko

CC: @eris@yourwalls.today

@eris akshually, Darth Vader and Anakin Skywalker are the same person ahh

@eris @eris JK Eris

Any relation to Rowling?

@arcana @eris Jesus Khrist Eris

WHAT! I thought Darth Vader is Skywalker's dad?!

@eris Anakin has the worst possible daddy issues (immaculate conception)

@eris @eris He was conceived by the midichlorians

@arcana @eris midiclussy

@eris @arcana @eris sorry i have to do this @BadFediPosts

Ok but to be honest, when I was a kid I learnt Star Wars lore from how Star Wars LEGO sets looked like & what the figurines/sets were named. At some point I thought Anakin & Luke are the same person and the guy just changed names like Obi-Wan & Ben. Anyways, by the time I got to the movies (started with prequels) I accepted that they're probably different people but I was still pretty sure that Vader is Anakin's secret father and it's gonna be a big reveal at some point. Shit like seeing Anakin getting his hand replaced with a robotic one in Episode 2 had me like "oh damn he's becoming just like his father".

Do you think that Plageuis accidentally created him? Since he had the power to create life out of nothing.

CC: @eris@yourwalls.today

@eris @arcana Plagueis created Osha and Mae, Sidious created Ani

Have not watched that one yet

CC: @arcana@layer02.net

@eris lol when I was a kid I thought Darth Maul became Vader (to be fair, none of the other prequels were out yet)

@eris@yourwalls.today @eris@p.enes.lv instead he became a heckin epic spider dude

So when I saw the same thing happen to Luke in ep5 it didn't hit as hard. But you bet your ass I was going wild seeing Luke force choke that pig guard using his prosthetic arm

CC: @eris@yourwalls.today

@eris @arcana tbh they never actually said. There was a comic where Vader has a vision and can see Palpatine standing behind pregnant Shmi, but it's not really canon because the dark side was giving him the vision and the writers are pussies and refuse to just admit that it's probably what actually happened

And it's like a given because Sidious was taught by Plagueis

Yeah, it's possible, Sidious would have the knowledge, he did say Plagueis taught the apprentice everything and S would've waited to kill P if there was something he hadn't been taught yet.

I personally hate the theory that the force created Anakin on its own as a response to dark side. But I can definitely see Anakin being a successful experiment outcome (or "side effect") by one of them (Plagueis or Sidious) that they forgot about. And if we extend this further, I can't imagine Palpatine ever having sex, so perhaps Rey is also a descendant from a similar experiment? That they tried to wipe out after realising how overpowered such experiments can end up being.

CC: @arcana@layer02.net

@eris tbh my theory is the force created Anakin to wipe out most of the Jedi lmao, I think they were the ones that were out of balance

If only Mace Windu had stopped hating Anakin and taught him he could just balance both sides

@eris@yourwalls.today @eris@p.enes.lv literally any one of the jedi council could have also just gone and freed his mom from slavery at any point to make him less traumatized and fucked up

@anemone @eris Yoda: lol wow this fuckin 9 year old is worried about his slave mom what a fucking little bitch just give into the dark side you fucking loser

Oh yeah, the entire "bring the force to balance" shit is so funny. Like excuse me Master don't you think there's a massive imbalance for the light side??? Are you sure a balancing is what you want? Also the Force balances itself all the time so having a morbillion light-side Jedi just makes sure that the 3 dark side users that exist out there are probably OP as fuck. Kreia was right

Pretty sure a silent majority of Jedi actually support slavery, because that way it's easier for them to acquire new pupils

CC: @eris@yourwalls.today

@anemone @eris @eris "This is not the Jedi way"
"Mmmmmmmmm, suffer in slavery to flying Jewish caricature, she must"
"What about the droid attack on the Wookies?"
"Squeak boop zoop breeeeee"

@arcana@fedi.layer02.net @eris@p.enes.lv @eris@yourwalls.today tatooine is actually greater israel in the future

@anemone @eris @eris Jabba the Settler

@eris @anemone

No it's "A little bitch, you are, to be worrying about your enslaved mother. Grow up, you must, little loser."

@eris @eris
> thread about pedantry
> someone mentions "immaculate conception" in a context that implies the virgin birth

actually not gonna take the bait, it's too strong and i need to lie down

@eris @eris the real takeaway is that white people should never be allowed to write anything in which any mystical power is supposed to be "balanced" somehow

@eris @eris @arcana

Plagueis created Osha

Finally someone cared about workplace safety.

@mold @arcana @eris @eris the wise