Ant-Themed Perfume Line Called:

'Pheromatticas'

Each 'pheromatic' is scent command the unique electronic dispenser creates custom 'phrases' or 'scentences' in the secret Formic language.

Pheromatics:
Formica - Acidic, bracing. Salt, copper, gasoline
Vector - Enticing, mysterious. Spice shop, smoke, library paste, ash
Diapause - Soothing and sleepy. Feathers, coco, yeast, beeswax
Bivouac - Bold, Brave. Shoe polish, gun powder, lathe oil
Alate - Regal, decadent. Ambergris, orchids.

#antFashion

This idea is so strange I have a feeling it would work.

Put different ants on each box. Have an inexplicable ad campaign that's basically slightly creepy art-films about ants, intercut with handsome people giving you knowing looks. Refuse to explain further.

Set the price absurdly high.

Anyone want to invest?

Of course the electronic dispenser would just be another source of mystery. Each pheromatic would screw in to it in a different place so that it looked like a mercury vapor rectifier with all five bottles attached.

Like most perfumes the bottles would be about $300 each, so owning the dispenser is only for those who are "in deep" --

You would use brass dials with engraved markings in an unknown language to "dial" a sentence.

Then it starts pulsing and flashing... #antFashion

@futurebird Million dollar idea, and to prove it:

@JonKramer

I wish "pet rocks" leaned into the geology angle a bit more... they could have had different breeds...

Also as much as people call the pet rock absurd... people have always liked rocks since the dawn of time. Pity they used exceptionally boring ones, it might have been more than just a flash in the pan "joke product"

@futurebird @JonKramer indeed, I've always had pet rocks. But don't buy from a breeder. Get a rescue, like this one of mine...

@futurebird @JonKramer i never knew about the "real" Product of the Pet Rock until i was an adult but among my prize possessions as a kid were a couple of rocks i bought because they looked like little frogs

@futurebird @JonKramer TIL this post is a year old

OMG formic acid perfume exists:

FYI: to ants formic acid will make them think they are under attack. So, they might go into a kind of frenzy with this one. You have been warned.

https://store.santiburgas.com/product/a-adh-aroma-de-hormiguero

They sell samples! I was not getting a full bottle of this because even if I like it I don't think I can use it around ants.

But, I am deeply curious about what this smells like exactly. I will report on the fragrance.

More important? I will find out what the ANTS think of it. I expect it will make them angry. Possibly they will view it as copyright infringement of some kind and do a class action suit.

(all ant law is class action)

@futurebird what's the thinking behind this? "Drives the ladies wild?" Technically true, but

@phooky

I expect is just smells nice? Formic acid has a lemon like smell. I could see it working.

My sample of the perfume (Santi Burgas "Aroma de Hormiguero" The Aroma of the Anthill) has arrived!

It's a gender neutral cologne. More musky than what I go for mostly. When you first put it on there is a bit of citrus that is *almost* "formic acid" but it's not nearly as pungent as angry ants. This might be a good thing, practically speaking.

As you wear it longer it becomes more earthy, with hints of moss and earth.

I suspect it will annoy bees and wasps, so not good for summer.

It's a "quality" perfume in that it has complexity and it lasts for a long time without being overwhelming.

One should avoid going in an elevator with a strong perfume and this one won't get you into trouble.

I kind of was hoping it would be more... bizarre and edgy. (just because I love perfumes that are kind of crazy, not so much to wear but just to smell...) But it's a very wearable fragrance inspired by ants and so there is no reason why it can't be popular.

My favorite daily perfume is "Activist Bohda" which smells like beeswax and honey. This one cannot be worn in spring or summer since bees will follow you. Really if you are dealing with insects skip the perfume.

I may also follow you with either of these. Make of that what you will.

I regard perfumes as a powerful tool to manage memories. I like to use different obscure fragrances to mark events or times of year.

Few things can bring back the past like a fragrance. Why not use it to save memories?

Pica the cat hates all human perfumes "stinky!"

But can you really listen to someone who finds the smell of roadkill "fascinating" and who is attracted to surströmming?

She also loves marmite. Which is more forgivable... but still.